she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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