I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
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