I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
how does that bad decision feel?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
