Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
time to smoke my breakfast
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
