should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
