Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
