She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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