Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
