You just made me feel so damn special
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize