I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize
