he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
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He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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