i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
and she was petting her beer can
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Randomize
