we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
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