He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
