he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
