fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
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It's official drugs can't kill me
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
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In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
i out mim tonsoeep
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