so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
True strength comes from lack of pants
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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