you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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