He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
