Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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