It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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