I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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