You're completely useless in the revolution.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
