I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize