did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
