She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Pants are for mortals
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
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