You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
