her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
