So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
is wine microwaveable?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
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