she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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