It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
