So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
