Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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