Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
