You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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