its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
