thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
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