hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Also, beer. Big fan.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
