I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
The power of my boobs compel you
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