no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
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