The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
well most of my day revolves around power hour
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
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