It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
How external is "for external use only"?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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