So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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