According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize