Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
