just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
