like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
