He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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