Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
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