porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
you didnt know i had herpes?
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
